Busy. Busy. Busy.

I can't believe it's been 2 months since I've posted on my blog. I remember when I first started blogging I thought I'd never be one of those bloggers who waited so long to write a post. Ha. It's funny how life can get in the way of blogging.

Thankfully, I just have a really sensitive sense of smell, and my blood sugar was not very elevated back in August when I had it checked. My fasting glucose test was totally normal, and my A1C was at borderline pre-diabetic levels, and I'm sure it's gone down since then. Still, it was a much-needed wake-up call! We've made drastic changes to our diet because of it, and we're starting to see some really positive results.

While my asthma still is not under control, it is finally responding to the new medicines I'm on, and I've been able to start tapering the steroids. I am so very thankful! I'm down to half the daily amount I started on back in June, and I'm hoping to be off them entirely by Christmas. And the number of breathing treatments I've needed has dropped by more than half. At the peak of the fires this summer, I was doing 7 a day. I'm now down to 3. It's progress for which I'm very grateful!

We've been busy with medical appointments for the girls. We've averaged 3 to 4 appointments a week since the last blog entry. The only break we had in appointments was after Hopper had surgery a couple of weeks ago. It doesn't look like things are going to slow down much on the medical front before the end of the year. We've already got another surgery scheduled and another one that we'll be scheduling next week. I'm glad the girls are getting the medical treatment they need, but I'm looking forward to a break in the action. I'm tired. 

I haven't done a lot of active dehoarding in the last few months, but I have no doubt that will come in time. I've had bigger things on my mind. The whole blood sugar scare, along with one surgeon wanting Hopper to lose some weight, so she can have a major surgery sometime next year has really opened our eyes to the way we were eating. We're now making a very concentrated effort to eat as healthily as we can. As a result, we've all lost a little weight. I'm down 15 pounds to date, Hubster is down 18, Hopper has lost 5 and Scooter has lost a couple, although she had the least amount to lose. And the best thing is that we've all been healthier than typical for this time of year. Yay for fruits and veggies!

Speaking of which, I've got about 40 pounds of tomatoes from the garden that need to be processed. I already canned several pints of Tomato Basil Sauce that is amazing, but now I need to make some salsa and can it, some more sauce and some whole tomatoes to use this winter. Even though our tomatoes didn't do as well as they did last year, I'm thrilled that we'll have such yummy goodness from the garden all winter long!

I'm hoping to get back to some serious dehoarding one of these days as life slows down a little. I'm also hoping to get back to more regular blogging. I miss it. And now that we no longer need to have the air conditioner on, (it is just feet away from the computer), I can actually sit at the computer without freezing.

There's something to be said for good weather blogging.

Remember when...

I'm not a skinny girl. I never have been. I haven't always been fat, either, but I've never been skinny.

When I was a kid, we had our weight and height checked once or twice a year at school. At the time, we'd also have to bare our backs wait while the nurse checked us for curvature of the spine. It was just more fun than a kid should be allowed to have. By the time we hit the 6th grade they added in questions about our menstrual cycles. I dreaded this time every year.

 We'd line up in the gymnasium/cafeteria/all purpose room, and step on a scale while our weight was announced aloud by the nurse while the other adult in the room recorded it. They'd also check our height and ask us whether or not we had started our periods. The questions were embarrassing enough on their own, but then we'd have to take our shirts off and bend over and hold onto our ankles, so they could check our backs. 

It didn't matter that there were screens set up for privacy, because there were always areas where the other students could peek in and see you in this most undignified position. I mean, it's not like we could actually hold our shirts over our developing bodies and hold onto our ankles at the same time. It was mortifying. 

There was so much about all of it that was humiliating, but the worst of it happened my 6th grade year, when the nurse announced my weight. The thing is, I didn't have an ounce of fat on my body, but that didn't seem to matter a bit when everyone in the gymnasium found out that I was the first child in 6th grade to reach 100 pounds. I was instantly labeled fat by the other kids.

It didn't matter that I wasn't. In fact, I didn't get fat until after I hurt my back at age 19, started having babies a couple years later, and then had the misfortune of bad health that resulted in a broken thyroid and asthma that required dose upon dose of steroids. But in the the world of cruelty that is adolescence my fate was sealed.

It didn't help that my friends were tiny in comparison. In fact my best friends in high school didn't even break 100, so I weighed more in 6th grade than they did 6 years later. The thing is, I was a healthy weight. When I look back at pictures, I wonder why in the world I felt so fat. I know a lot of it stems from the gasps of the other classmates at my weight when I was 11 and the gossip that ensued. My weight was the topic of much ugliness over the years, and I've never quite known how to get past it.

Oh! To be able to talk to that girl I was and let her know that I was perfectly healthy. To get through to her that the girl that called me, "Thunder Thighs" was trying to get past the hurt of finding out that her mom had cheated on her dad. That the boy who sneered and called me, "Lard Ass" was acting out, because he was being beaten by his dad. That the girl who called me a "fat ugly bitch" was trying to cover that she was being molested by her uncle. 

I would like to think it would have changed the way I saw myself and the way I saw others, as well. I was a compassionate kid. I could have seen through their behavior to their hurt. Instead, I've carried it around for well over 30 years and still haven't gotten over it. Then again, it didn't help that some of those same kids acted the same way at my 20th high school reunion. 

It's really a shame that their lives are still filled with such cruelty towards others, and it's an even bigger shame that I still haven't gotten over the sting of their words. They're probably still hurting. And maybe I could have made a difference, if I didn't feel the need to put up my defenses and shield myself from their barbs.

Maybe someday. 

 

Cheers!

So. My final post of the year. Wow. I can't believe 2010 has come to an end.


In many ways, I'm going to miss 2010. It's been a good year. A really good year, even. It's been full of struggles, full of honesty, reflection and self realization, full of hard work and full of hope and the additions to our family of Bubster and Frank when Bugster and Bubster wed back in April and they took guardianship of Frank over the summer. 

How can I not miss it?


It's been a good year.


But I am so full of hope for 2011 and what it holds in store for our family, that I will gladly bid this year adieu.

In spite of having an infection in my incision wound, I'm feeling quite well. I'm so thankful that I had the surgery. I'm already wishing I'd done it years ago. I am hoping that it will make the difference in my health that I'm thinking it's going to make. 


Last year, I was at my heaviest weight of all time, having taken 6 or 7 courses of steroids after coming down with the swine flu. I was sick all winter. I eventually lost 15 of the 30 pounds I'd gained due to the steroids, but when I came home from surgery, I'd gained the 15 pounds back from the swelling and fluid retention I was experiencing. I wondered, if it was going to take another year to lose it.


It didn't.


Unlike most women who gain weight after a hysterectomy, I have somehow beat the odds so far. I lost the 15 pounds I brought home from the hospital plus an additional 15 pounds. And in spite of the fact that I still have over 100 pounds to lose, I'm 30 pounds closer to my goal and the least I've weighed in 3 years. It gives me hope that I will eventually be successful at losing the weight just like I'm going to eventually finish dehoarding and organizing my home.


I am confident that 2011 is going to be a wonderful continuation of the journey I started January 9, 2010. 


In the meantime, we'll be wrapping up 2010 in a couple of hours. About 30 minutes from now, I'll wake up Hopper, Scooter and Mom (We're still blessed with her company due to a storm that moved in yesterday! We're thrilled!), so we can ring in the New Year together. 


We'll be enjoying our annual New Year's fondue. We'll be fixing chicken, beef and Inside Out Cheeseburgers, and we'll enjoy fresh broccoli, cauliflower, carrots and celery with a Ranch dip made with Greek yogurt instead of sour cream along with cheese and crackers. Once we're done eating, we'll toast with sparkling cider and watch the big ball drop while calling loved ones at the stroke of midnight to wish them Happy New Year. To top things off, it looks like The Hubster will even be able to join us this year!


Oh. You're wondering what Inside Out Cheeseburgers are. 

I understand. 

They're a fun fondue food and taste amazing. They're made by whisking up a couple of eggs and adding whatever spices you wish to use. I just use a little pepper and garlic salt. Add the lean ground beef, (it holds together better in the hot oil than turkey burger) and bread crumbs and mix it together until it's fairly dry but not crumbly. 


Form a ball using 1 to 2 tablespoons of the burger mixture and push a hole down into the center of the ball. Insert a piece of cheese in the hole. I've used Velveeta before, but it disintegrates in oil too easily and seeps out. So use something harder. This year I'm trying Colby Jack cheese, although I may try cheddar next year depending on how things turn out tonight. Anyway, you finish them off by rolling them in breadcrumbs, because they hold together better that way and cook them in your fondue pot until done, which will vary depending on the size. 


So there you have it. We're going to have fun tonight. I had an amazing 2010 filled with both ups and downs but an awful lot of growth and loss. And I'm going to embrace 2011 for all it's worth.


May each of you have an amazing New Year every day of 2011 and be blessed beyond measure! 


Here's to you. To me. To us. 


Cheers!

Baby steps and all.

Taking a break right now and watching Biggest Loser. It's incredibly inspiring, and I desperately need inspiration to keep going on the treadmill. It kills my back especially after not having been on it for 2 years. In fact, I had to take pain medicine and a muscle relaxant when I was done walking tonight. I'm hoping that as I lose weight and build my core muscles my back pain will go away or at least lessen enough I don't need steroid shots anymore. Eventually, I'm likely going to need surgery, but there's no way they'll touch my back at this weight. I easily have over 100 pounds to lose.

So tonight, my second night on the treadmill, I did 15 minutes instead of only 10, and I increased the incline to 2 for part of the walk. It's not much at all. I used to be able to walk miles with no problem. In junior high and high school I was in track. I often ran the mile or two mile, and even though I wasn't the best, I did it. It will likely be awhile before I work up to a mile on the treadmill. The doctor has told me I need to only be on it for a few minutes at a time, so I don't overdo and hurt my back even more.

The main thing is that I need to be on it regularly.

I've at least started.

And at least we've put the treadmill in it's own separate room with other workout equipment, so it can't get covered with clothes, papers or books.

I will do this in spite of myself just as surely as I will finish the process of dehoarding the house. It will happen.

So now that I'm done with the pep talk I needed to give myself, onto other things.....

I was able to finish the last coat of paint on the majority of the bookshelf/entertainment center today. I will hopefully be able to finish it up completely tomorrow, so it can sit on the back porch to air out for a few days before we take it downstairs. I have well under half of it left. It is looking really nice. I'm pleased with it, but I'll tell you something...it's a lot harder to paint bead board than it looks! The paint has to basically be forced down into the grooves. It doesn't go in willingly.

When I was done with the painting, I went downstairs to work on the outlets. We need to replace the outlets in the workout room and a couple in the family room. We also have to add spacers to some of the outlets, because they're recessed so far back into the walls. You see, the outlets in the outside walls in the basement are in concrete. And whoever put the paneling up on the walls likely did it, because the outlets would be recessed, if drywall was used. And since we chose drywall, we need to extend the boxes the outlets are in by at least an inch and a half.

I was able to get two of the outlets finished, but right as I was finishing up the 2nd outlet, the light went off. I think it overheated. It's a halogen treble light. So I guess I'll have to work on them during the daylight when I can see a little better without artificial help. I was going to work on replacing all the outlets in the workout room and the few I have to do in the family room, but I can't find the box of new outlets, either. We used them recently when we installed the ceiling fan in Scooter's room and replaced her outlets, but for the life of me I couldn't find them when I looked today. I'll look again tomorrow or go buy more. We have enough outlets that still need replaced that we'll use the ones in the box eventually anyway. I just want to get them finished.

I'll be going to bed early tonight, because the muscle relaxant is going to kick in hard and make me really sleepy soon, I'm sure. It's probably a good thing. I still need to get on that elusive schedule.

Instead. I sleep like a baby.

A few hours here.

A few hours there.