Compulsive hoarding is a mental disorder that is just beginning to be understood. As a hoarder, I have acquired things over the years with a specific purpose in mind at the time of the acquisition, used some of those items for their intended purposes, forgotten the goal for different objects, but now that I find that they have outlived their purpose in my life I am struggling to rid myself of those same things.

You can read the start of my journey here.

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Scattered thoughts.

Besides getting some more laundry done today and hanging out with the family, I haven't been all that productive in any measurable way.

I was able to toss a few pair of socks that I think I've had since I was in high school. The girls wore them a time or two, but they're not really worth saving. So even though they were clean and were still usable, I threw them away. I have to admit that I was surprised how easy it was to do. A year ago, I'd have had a mild panic attack over throwing them. In fact, I probably did struggle with anxiety over getting rid of them back then, and that's probably why they were still here. 

Over the course of the last couple of years, I've found that, if I just walk away from something and leave it until I'm ready to deal with it that I'm more often than not able to let it go. It may have once been high on my list of anxiety-provoking things to deal with, but by the time I get back to it again I'm ready to say goodbye. There have been numerous things that I've not been able to make a decision about getting rid of in the past, like the socks I threw away today, and I've been able to get rid of them without a second thought just weeks after the last struggle. 

I think a lot of it has to do with allowing myself to feel the anxiety with making a decision instead of pushing it down. Even if the decision I make is to not make a decision right away, feeling the anxiety allows for me to actually make a decision about the item when I come across it again. Most of the time, I am ready and willing to part with whatever it is, and I find that I'm looking forward to tackling those decisions I've put off in the past. 

Some other thought work I did today has to do with a project I'm working on for Bugster's 25th birthday that's coming up in a few weeks. Because she's been known to read my blog from time to time, I won't be mentioning details just yet. But I am thrilled I have a really good idea of what I'm going to be doing with it. I'll be taking pictures and post them when I'm done. I'm really looking forward to working on the project, and making it special. 

I'm also looking forward to bed. Once again, I'm up entirely too late. 


  1. I am so proud of you.


    My aunt on the other hand is being evicted for her hoard. So now she is looking to buy her own home, and now I fear it will be even more out of control. *sigh* If that's even possible.

  2. Right on. Allowing yourself to feel the anxiety means that you can face it and let it go. Awesome thought work!

  3. Pictures, huh? Like all those pinatas?




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