Compulsive hoarding is a mental disorder that is just beginning to be understood. As a hoarder, I have acquired things over the years with a specific purpose in mind at the time of the acquisition, used some of those items for their intended purposes, forgotten the goal for different objects, but now that I find that they have outlived their purpose in my life I am struggling to rid myself of those same things.

You can read the start of my journey here.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

As The Stomach Turns

My stomach is once again riding the anxiety merry-go-round after having made a safe dismount recently.

Got the call a bit ago that the court visitor will be out tomorrow afternoon.

I feel like I haven't been able to breathe since I spoke with her. She was very nice, and she tried to reassure me, when I told her of the anxiety since we started the proceedings. She asked me why we were so stressed. I told her that even though we know that the chance of something going wrong is .00000001%, that the mere thought of that .00000001% going wrong is enough to stress out parents who absolutely adore their children. That we have every intention of keeping them with us for as long as we're capable of taking care of them and the thought of not being able to is very stressful.

She told me not to worry. She's been doing this for years, and cases like ours are considered a 'slam dunk'. And while my head is so incredibly relieved to hear that, my heart and my gut are churning. 


Well...I'm off to get something done before her visit tomorrow.


  1. Slam dunk.

    Your win.

    That's all folks... have a great night.


  2. I'll be thinking of you Wed. afternoon! I look forward to reading your post after the visit, in which you will say, "Yes, it was a slam dunk." :)

  3. What?? I must have missed a few post I hope all goes well.


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