Relentless.

I've never been great at making New Year's resolutions. I mean I've had good intentions and thought about making them, but it just didn't make sense for me to make resolutions for specific goals I had in mind. Life in our house isn't necessarily conducive to keeping a list of  individual goals in the forefront of my mind. Too many things/illnesses/surgeries/doctors' appointments/etc. eventually nudge out any thought of resolutions, and things go back to they way they always are before too long. While I do consider what I would like to change the following year, I don't write it down and don't make a commitment that I can't keep. I don't need the extra pressure. I've got enough pressure without adding an extra helping, because it's tradition.

Last week, a friend asked me, if I'd ever chosen a word to represent a year instead of resolutions. I hadn't , but I was intrigued. My thoughts over the last several days have continually drifted to her question. I really like the concept of a single word to represent the whole year to call on for motivation. It's a lot easier to remember a single word than it is a long list of things you want to change. I like that I can have one word represent how I want to tackle things in my life. 

So for 2019, I've chosen the word 'Relentless'. 

I will be relentless in my quest to tackle the hoard and continue to make good decisions to get rid of things. I will be relentless in my pursuit of personal growth. I will be relentlessly loving my family. 

These I can do. They might not look like a specific goal on a piece of paper, but I will accomplish much, and I will be able to motivate myself with a single word. 

I. Will. Be. Relentless.

It Was Nice Knowing You.

We've been through a lot these last 365, you and me. I hope you don't mind me moving on. It's not you. I promise.

I'm not complaining. At least I'm trying not to complain, but I really am ready for the new beginning that a new year promises. It gives me hope, and hope is what I need. 

I hope that things start to normalize for us a bit. 

I hope that the behavior therapists can help the girls and help us with the girls when they struggle with their emotions. 

I hope that we can figure out something that will help Hubster more with the Parkinson's, so he isn't so tired so much of the time.

I hope that we can figure out something to help the girls better with communication.

I hope that we can get a central air unit, so Hubster has a place to escape the heat this summer, since it kicked his butt last year.

I hope that I can make exercise a priority again.

I hope that I have the willpower not to drink that evil elixir that rhymes with Moctor Depper. 

I hope that now we have finished the clutter on the outside of the house, we can make headway on the clutter that is within. 

I hope that I can make it to my blog to post more often, because I find it therapeutic, and I miss it terribly. 

I hope that I can be silent, that I might hear His voice and abide in His love even more.

And I hope that each of you has a wonderful 2016!

Happy New Year!

It's official.

Sort of.


Christmas Eve's mail included paperwork from the attorney letting us know that he had petitioned the court on our behalf. Things were finally in motion. We knew to expect more soon, but we didn't realize how soon that would be.


Last week's mail included more paperwork from the attorney letting us know the name of the court appointed visitor who will be working on the girls' behalf. Her report is due to the courts by January 17th, so she will be calling us to set up a meeting with the girls very soon. We're assuming we'll be hearing from her in the next couple of days. I think all the court offices are closed tomorrow for the New Year holiday, but I wouldn't be surprised, if we get the call Tuesday. I guess we'll see.


So that which we have dreaded is upon us.


So far, we're surviving. My stomach didn't start flipping over the paperwork that came on Christmas Eve. In fact it came as almost a relief, because it was finally here. We can now deal with it in the present instead of as an unknown future thing. The paperwork that came yesterday, though? Yeah. Not quite as much a relief. At the same time, the anxiety meds are doing their job, and I'm actually doing okay with it all. For now. We'll see what happens when we actually have a court date. 


In the meantime, I'll try to keep on keepin' on. I'll try to get caught up on the laundry and attempt to get the girls' rooms under control once again. It really doesn't take a lot for them to get messed up, but at least it only takes a fraction of the time to get them back in order that it used to take. The frustration comes from the fact that Scooter would keep her own room fairly clean, if it weren't for Hopper 'helping' put things in there. She just opens the door and lobs whatever is in her hand at the time into the room and then shuts the door. 


I'm also going to make an effort to do a daily blog post again, a resolution, if you will. Posting has been such a huge help over the last couple of years, and I've really missed it and the imaginary friends I've met while blogging. While I will be trying to post daily for awhile, I know I'm not going to have the mental wherewithal to read blogs until we're through this guardianship situation. Hopefully, I'll be able to catch up here and there once this big stressor is behind us. 


Until then...


Wishing everyone Happy & Healthy New Year Blessings!

Cheers!

So. My final post of the year. Wow. I can't believe 2010 has come to an end.


In many ways, I'm going to miss 2010. It's been a good year. A really good year, even. It's been full of struggles, full of honesty, reflection and self realization, full of hard work and full of hope and the additions to our family of Bubster and Frank when Bugster and Bubster wed back in April and they took guardianship of Frank over the summer. 

How can I not miss it?


It's been a good year.


But I am so full of hope for 2011 and what it holds in store for our family, that I will gladly bid this year adieu.

In spite of having an infection in my incision wound, I'm feeling quite well. I'm so thankful that I had the surgery. I'm already wishing I'd done it years ago. I am hoping that it will make the difference in my health that I'm thinking it's going to make. 


Last year, I was at my heaviest weight of all time, having taken 6 or 7 courses of steroids after coming down with the swine flu. I was sick all winter. I eventually lost 15 of the 30 pounds I'd gained due to the steroids, but when I came home from surgery, I'd gained the 15 pounds back from the swelling and fluid retention I was experiencing. I wondered, if it was going to take another year to lose it.


It didn't.


Unlike most women who gain weight after a hysterectomy, I have somehow beat the odds so far. I lost the 15 pounds I brought home from the hospital plus an additional 15 pounds. And in spite of the fact that I still have over 100 pounds to lose, I'm 30 pounds closer to my goal and the least I've weighed in 3 years. It gives me hope that I will eventually be successful at losing the weight just like I'm going to eventually finish dehoarding and organizing my home.


I am confident that 2011 is going to be a wonderful continuation of the journey I started January 9, 2010. 


In the meantime, we'll be wrapping up 2010 in a couple of hours. About 30 minutes from now, I'll wake up Hopper, Scooter and Mom (We're still blessed with her company due to a storm that moved in yesterday! We're thrilled!), so we can ring in the New Year together. 


We'll be enjoying our annual New Year's fondue. We'll be fixing chicken, beef and Inside Out Cheeseburgers, and we'll enjoy fresh broccoli, cauliflower, carrots and celery with a Ranch dip made with Greek yogurt instead of sour cream along with cheese and crackers. Once we're done eating, we'll toast with sparkling cider and watch the big ball drop while calling loved ones at the stroke of midnight to wish them Happy New Year. To top things off, it looks like The Hubster will even be able to join us this year!


Oh. You're wondering what Inside Out Cheeseburgers are. 

I understand. 

They're a fun fondue food and taste amazing. They're made by whisking up a couple of eggs and adding whatever spices you wish to use. I just use a little pepper and garlic salt. Add the lean ground beef, (it holds together better in the hot oil than turkey burger) and bread crumbs and mix it together until it's fairly dry but not crumbly. 


Form a ball using 1 to 2 tablespoons of the burger mixture and push a hole down into the center of the ball. Insert a piece of cheese in the hole. I've used Velveeta before, but it disintegrates in oil too easily and seeps out. So use something harder. This year I'm trying Colby Jack cheese, although I may try cheddar next year depending on how things turn out tonight. Anyway, you finish them off by rolling them in breadcrumbs, because they hold together better that way and cook them in your fondue pot until done, which will vary depending on the size. 


So there you have it. We're going to have fun tonight. I had an amazing 2010 filled with both ups and downs but an awful lot of growth and loss. And I'm going to embrace 2011 for all it's worth.


May each of you have an amazing New Year every day of 2011 and be blessed beyond measure! 


Here's to you. To me. To us. 


Cheers!